Adam
CruM
CruM
videos
adamcrumart@yahoo.com
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Artist's Statement
It's like having the epiphany that the thing
that you aspire to do most in the world is to
be one of the resident prostitutes on HBO's
"Cathouse."--- totally straight rocking the
gelled perm-smelling like coconut, playing
scrabble with the other hoes and even
winning..(sometimes), majorly jammin' out to
candlebox on your discman, ..........but then
suddenly the terrifying realization hits that
your legs were amputated last night while
you were passed out at a rave........ but its
totally cool 'cause then your pager goes off
and you get the call that says "Cathouse"
wants to hire you anyway!!!!!!!!.........so then in
celebration you light up a Virginia Slim and
order your tickets to Nevada on Priceline and
start to brainstorm how you can smuggle
meth on the airline inside your hair. Half way
through boarding you are approached by
airport officials who promptly arrest you and
throw you in an a womens' prison where you
align with a lesbian gang called the
Lesbeatins and they teach you how to
crochet, lift weights, and play dodgeball-
and most importantly how to cook vienna
sausages right(in a stew made with spit and
dandelions from the yard). You gotta scrap
off the gelatin and mix it with the spit says
Brenda........ and what Brenda says goes.
It's like having the epiphany that the thing
that you aspire to do most in the world is to
be one of the resident prostitutes on HBO's
"Cathouse."--- totally straight rocking the
gelled perm-smelling like coconut, playing
scrabble with the other hoes and even
winning..(sometimes), majorly jammin' out to
candlebox on your discman, ..........but then
suddenly the terrifying realization hits that
your legs were amputated last night while
you were passed out at a rave........ but its
totally cool 'cause then your pager goes off
and you get the call that says "Cathouse"
wants to hire you anyway!!!!!!!!.........so then in
celebration you light up a Virginia Slim and
order your tickets to Nevada on Priceline and
start to brainstorm how you can smuggle
meth on the airline inside your hair. Half way
through boarding you are approached by
airport officials who promptly arrest you and
throw you in an a womens' prison where you
align with a lesbian gang called the
Lesbeatins and they teach you how to
crochet, lift weights, and play dodgeball-
and most importantly how to cook vienna
sausages right(in a stew made with spit and
dandelions from the yard). You gotta scrap
off the gelatin and mix it with the spit says
Brenda........ and what Brenda says goes.
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